weddingpics

Jillian Reeves & Efren Ortiz

">Today is my Wedding day. Almost impossible to believe, right? E and I were up at like 5:30 this morning. He still seemed really drugged up..and I was beginning to question if he going to be well enough for us to marry. I told him my concerns and he got very upset. He was almost crying telling me not to make him feel like it was his fault. I told him that I wasn't trying to make him feel that way, I just didn't know what to do. He told me if we were gonna call the wedding off, that we needed to do it right then...that we needed to tell everyone as soon as possible. This was so tough....We really do love each other very much and we both new that neither of us wanted to call the wedding off. I asked him what he wanted to do. He looked at me, his speech still a slightly garbled from the medicine, and he said, "I know I want to marry you." I looked into his loving eyes and I told him I wanted to marry him, too. He said, "Then let's get married. Marry me today." I told him that I wanted to but that the effect the medicine was having on him had to be addressed. I'd felt since Thursday that they had only increased his pain patch so dramatically (the doubled his does!) was to get him out of the hospital. Both he and I were really frustrated at how much the new dose of patches was effecting him. He said, "Then let's take one off." I looked at him and saw that he was absolutely serious...sometimes he really took my breath away. That he would be willing to endure more pain, in order to get through our wedding was overwhelming. We decided to remove one of the 75mcg patches right then, and that we would replace it either right before or right after the wedding... if he felt any pain creeping up than we would use the morphine. Not matter what, we decided that we were definitely getting married today. We felt at peace with the decision to remove the patch and continue with the wedding so we went back to sleep in each others arms for a while.

830am... time to wake up a get ready for the wedding!!!! We took "before" pictures so that we could see our transformations. E gets up and starts "grooming", he asks me if he should shave his goatee or leave it (he was so cute)... I told him he was handsome either way and to ask his sister and her partner what they thought. We all decided that the facial hair should stay and he should just trim it. He came in the room and got his skinny pants, his new belt and his black dress shirt...he was going to change in the living room so that I could prepare in the bedroom. My turn to get ready. I'm sure I'd be much more nervous if I was actually thinking about the wedding thing...lol. I find that is often much easier to do something if you just do it and not think too much about it. I'm bustling around doing my hair, I put on my yellow dress and try to revive my face with some makeup. The wedding day is suppose to be the day a woman is at her most beautiful....that's A LOT of pressure. E knocked on the door and said he was looking for his shoes. "Don't come in here!" I yelled...I wanted to look as perfect as possible when he saw me. I was already a little upset that I had only brought black pumps with me...but I guess they would have to do. I had 3 yellow Gerber daises (E's favorite flowers) in our room...I cut one off and put it in my hair. I sprayed a little Chanel Chance on my neck and wrist as a finishing touch (I hoped E was not too sensitive to smells today and that the fragrance wouldn't make him nauseous...). I was now ready to leave the room.

I walked out of the room and E was sitting in the dining room with his back to me. I walked in front of him and said "Are you ready?". He looked at me...in a way that only He can... like he was seeing me for the first time all over again, and it took his breath away. After looking at me this way for a few moments, he said, "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life." That man of mine...he has a way of saying these things... its almost like his heart is filled to bursting...and he has to share these words with you...because you are the reason for his heart being so full.... I can't explain it, but he has a way of making me feel like I'm the most amazing woman that ever lived. We share a kiss....one of the most beautiful we've ever had.

Now, its almost time to go. His feet are and legs have swollen again so we decide to use the support socks I bought him. It was very tough getting those tight socks around his very swollen feet but we manage. I go to help him put his shoes on but they don't fit! His feet are just too swollen. I told him its ok, and that he could just wear the socks with his slide ons. Maritza was there helping us and agreed that it would be fine. We are finally ready! His sister Angel, who was driving us to the church, was still getting ready so we decided to go sit on the porch to wait for her. It was such a beautiful day. Maritza was headed to a Cubs game, but she took a few pictures of us since she wasn't going to attend the ceremony.
Ok, Angel's ready and we are off. We make a quick run to Walgreen's to get Dr. Brazier (the minister that's marrying us) a thank you card...and take some time while we're in the parking lot to get Efren comfortable. Car rides can be tough for him. Now we're on our way to the church. We're talking about how much of an offering we should give the pastor since they weren't charging us for the wedding...E wants to give $50 but the discussion was quickly settled when I discovered I only had $25 in cash and we had no time for an ATM trip.
Oh, my God..it's finally sinking in...I'm getting married! We are actually on our way to the church...no takebacks...it's really going to happen....unbelievable. I asked E if he was nervous, he said "yes, a little.... aren't you?" I was kinda shocked to hear that he was nervous, he had always seemed so sure and confident when we were planning to get married before. I think the fact that he WAS so sure the first time we planned to get married actually freaked me out a little. I thought, why is he sooo sure and I'm sooo nervous? I figured something must be wrong and maybe it wasn't a good sign. So, as crazy as it sounds, I was very happy to hear that he was nervous...it made me much more comfortable to know that we were both in the same boat, it made everything seem right. Angel told both of us that it was only natural to be nervous because we were making a big step. I knew she was right. But even though I was nervous, I was very resolute...I knew I was making the right decision to marry E and that the nervousness was more about the situation and less about the decision to marry. I thank Bishop Brazier, our pre-marriage pastoral counsel, for this peace of mind.

When we arrived at the church, his family is already there. His nieces look adorable...but there is no sign of my only guest and pseudo-family member, Ms. Judy. We are right on time so we're feeling a little bit rushed. Terry, E's brother-in-law takes him to the side for the standard "talk"...but it was very short lived. I heard E tell Terry that we had to go and meet with minister only a few moments after they started talking. I asked him what was said...he told me that Terry said he wanted talk to him about marriage, b/c he was making a huge decision. E cut him off and said "No, I'm not." I knew what he meant. For him, the decision to marry me was never huge, or tough...it was as natural as the seasons changing. He's talked about marring me for the past 2 years... and thanks to God's grace and mercy, I could stand before him now, with the same desire in my heart. I felt the same way...marrying him was the most natural thing in the world. It felt absolutely right.

We met with the minister and told him we were ready. He suggested that we do the ceremony in the conference room.. I asked if we could go into the church to the altar....he assured me that the he'd done many ceremonies in the conference room...I told him that I really wanted to be in the church at the alter (I'm a stubborn son-of-a-gun). The small sanctuary was being used, but he allowed us to go into the main hall for the ceremony. I grabbed a plastic bag from the gift shot (in case E got sick), Terry set up the camcorder, we gave his nieces, Brenda and Nicki, our rings and the ceremony began. It was very beautiful...very spiritual with a lot of prayer. The standing began to take a toll on E and Dr. Brazier asked if he'd like to sit down. He said yes and we continued the rest of the ceremony, along with our vows sitting on the front pew. When we went to sit down, I looked back and saw that Ms. Judy had finally made it! I was sooo happy! I was really feeling bad about not having any family there, and I was surprised at how much better it made me feel to see her. Dr. Brazier instructed E and I to hold hands throughout the ceremony. He spoke to us about love and read that beautiful passage of love from Corinthians. He told E that he had to love me as Christ loved the church, and he told me I that I had to submit to E (what?!..lol) and love and respect him also. We said our vows and exchanged rings. Dr. Brazier had to remind us to keep holding hands...lol. He was very slick about it, he said "And as you continue to hold hands...." lol...I was like oops! I was so close to crying. Part of me still couldn't believe that it was happening...part of me was totally overwhelmed by emotion...I was getting married. I heard him say "you may now kiss the bride"...we kissed...I have to say, it was the most beautiful experience of my life...simply beautiful. Dr. Brazier said "I now present to you Mr. and Mrs. Efren and Jillian Ortiz. We stood up and everyone just looked at us....Dr. Brazier said.."it's ok for you all to clap now" It was funny...everyone clapped and I was welcomed to the family. Lots of hugs and kisses. His sister Laura hugged me and told me to "make him happy". I was annoyed by this until Efren told me that she told him the same thing...lol. I'm so silly sometimes. We took a bunch of pictures then E, Angel and I went home, while everyone else went to breakfast. E was getting tired and we had an appointment that night with the Chinese doctor so he needed to rest.

We got home and I took off those tight socks and helped him into bed. We joked about how much things had changed...especially the fact that I was the one crying at our wedding while he was so strong....TOTAL OPPOSITE of how we used to be. I asked him why he didn't cry, he said he just wanted to take all of me in. He said he thought the ceremony was beautiful, as well. He was very tired and his pain was beginning to intensify. His voice was weak and his breathing was becoming kinda rapid...it was obvious that all the activity of the past few days was getting to him. I laid down beside him so we could rest, but I couldn't resist asking one more question..."sooo, how do you feel?" I asked. He thought about for just a second and whispered...."fulfilled". I snuggled close to my new husband, whom I loved with all my heart, grateful that everything was as it should be.